A famous English writer once said, “To be or not to be? That is the question.” But in the world of weddings, the more pressing question is: “To do or not to do?” We sat down with local wedding planners to pick their brains about all the pros and cons of the more controversial wedding decisions and whether to do (or not to do) them.

Kimberly Rhodes of Hitched Events weighed in this week.

Taking a long engagement

• Pro: With a long engagement, you’ll likely have more options available to you in terms of venues and wedding vendors. Wedding planning can be more leisurely as well, allowing you to really enjoy the process.
• Con: A long engagement can sometimes make the planning process drag on. Plus, it’s easy to change your mind or question your decisions when you have too much time to think about them.

Destination wedding

• Pro: Your wedding and honeymoon can be bundled together. Destination weddings are a bit more intimate, making the wedding a fun vacation with your closest family and friends.
• Con: Because it can be more difficult and more expensive for guests to attend a destination wedding, you may not have all the friends and family you want in attendance.

Having someone you know officiate

• Pro: The ceremony is usually more personal and heartfelt when someone you know is officiating. A personal relationship allows your officiant to speak honestly about your relationship, as opposed to simply reading scripture.
• Con: If the person officiating hasn’t done it before, they might appear nervous or not be comfortable with the role. If they aren’t an experienced officiant, they may need some guidance on the traditional order and protocol for the wedding ceremony.

Writing your own vows

• Pro: Writing your own vows allows you to completely personalize the ceremony and express your love and devotion to your partner in your own words. Personalized wedding vows are often the most touching and can be tearjerkers!
• Con: For couples that are extremely emotional, reading your own vows can be hard to get through.

Giving your bridesmaids a certain color, but then allowing them to choose their dress

• Pro: Each bridesmaid can choose a style of dress that flatters their body type and that they feel the most comfortable in.
• Con: With a very large wedding party, having each bridesmaid in a different dress style may look a bit busy and not streamlined for photos.